dmdubay

Posted on December 2, 2014 by dmdubay

December1^st With the new month and the season of Advent beginning, it is time to change focus. November was for giving thanks and I want to hang on to an attitude of gratitude and to the awareness of all the things for which I can be grateful. But the theme for December is generosity. I read a suggestion in the paper yesterday: a challenge. It sort of goes along with my theme for October, which was lightening the load, but has a slight a twist. The challenge is to get rid of things every day this month. Give, sell, donate or trash one thing on December first, two things on December 2^nd, three on the 3^rd and so on, until you get to thirty-one things on the 31^st. I’m going to try. But I want it to be in the spirit of giving, rather than getting rid of. I’ll attempt to give things that are dear to me and I know the recipients would love to receive. I’ll let you know how it goes. Anyone care to join the challenge?

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leftovers

Posted on December 1, 2014 by dmdubay

What would I do without leftovers? I enjoy all the traditional Thanksgiving dishes and the company and festivity; but the leftovers the next day are even better. And the fact that I don’t have to do all the cooking makes it relaxed and easy. I just warm things up. We always run out of stuffing and cranberry sauce, so this year we doubled up on them. Now we can have the whole Thanksgiving dinner two or three days in a row. Plus, I never tire of turkey vegetable soup. On these cold winter days it’s the perfect thing.

Warmth, comfort, story telling, family and friends: it’s about more than the turkey, isn’t it? I think celebrating holidays is important to the psyche and extracting all we can from the leftovers prolongs the joy. Rather than something to be thrown out or endured for lack of something better, leftovers extend and enhance the happening, and reinforce the idea of why we gathered to celebrate in the first place.

story time

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Black Friday

Posted on November 28, 2014 by dmdubay

November 28^th I’m sure you have been busy preparing and celebrating Thanksgiving and did not miss the fact that I did not write for the past two days. What a wonderful feast we had! And I hope yours was equally fulfilling. I’ve been counting my blessings and they are way too numerous to list. Even trying to enumerate the top ones is nearly impossible.

One of our guests was talking about the need for more gratitude and less greed in this country. I think he hit the nail on the head. On this Black Friday, I’m giving thanks that I don’t have to go out and fight with the crowds. I already have enough. When I consider the contrast between Good Friday—which the world considers a most horrible day, but is the most perfect example of total giving—and Black Friday, I am struck by how appropriately named they both are.

so close

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published!

Posted on November 25, 2014 by dmdubay

Two days before Thanksgiving and I’ve been practicing all month. Today I am thankful especially that my book is finally, totally complete. It will be available for Kindle by tomorrow and a hard copy can be ordered from Amazon within five days. I want to have a big party to celebrate and thank all the people who have helped me see it through to completion. Tales of Two Sisters has been in the works for a long time and I have learned a lot. Today I thank in a very special way all of my fellow writers who have so generously shared their knowledge and expertise with me. They know I couldn’t and wouldn’t have done it without them.

sisters

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show tunes

Posted on November 25, 2014 by dmdubay

I saw a video on line the other day about a nursing home resident who had not spoken for years. He sat in a wheel chair with his chin on his chest and was totally uncommunicative. One day they began music therapy and put a headset on him with music playing. After some time with the music, his demeanor changed. He opened his eyes, looked around and was moving to the music—dancing in his wheelchair. They asked him if they could remove the headset for a while and although he looked displeased, he agreed. They began to ask him “yes or no” questions. He responded in a loud and clear voice. Then they asked questions that required longer answers. He again spoke out clearly. When asked who his favorite singer was, he responded by giving a name (I didn’t recognize it) and then proceeded to sing one of his favorite songs. Amazing!

I am so grateful to be able to provide a similar experience to the residents of a local nursing home. Once a month, a group of us sing show tunes to a group there and encourage them to sing along. What joy it brings to see the smiles and nostalgic looks as they belt out “Oklahoma” or “I Could Have Danced All Night.” And what a gift it is to me to share memories of music that has touched my life.

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acknowledgements

Posted on November 23, 2014 by dmdubay

Aesop said, “Gratitude is the sign of noble souls.” I had no idea I could become nobility simply by giving thanks and expressing gratitude.

In the acknowledgements section of my book, I thank the people who helped me along the way, but I didn’t go far enough. There are so many who affirm me every day and have encouraged me all my life, it would be impossible to enumerate them all; but I an exceedingly grateful for all who have helped. I appreciate the simple reminders and encouraging words, such as: “How is your book coming along?” Or, “Wow! You’re writing a book. How cool is that?” To, “I’m so proud of you for sticking with it.” It seems most individual accomplishments are really not individual at all. Without others holding you up in prayer, or providing an environment for growth, or feeding you in many diverse ways, any strides forward would be unimaginable. I hope I can be that support for others enabling them to become all they can be.

jumping the Lethe

made it

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Posted on November 21, 2014 by dmdubay

I’ve noticed lately that when I focus on gratitude, I find more and more things for which to be thankful. Trying to describe one thing, others distract me, and I don’t want to leave anything out. For example, this morning walking in the rain I was so grateful for the moderate temperature, the rain, my well fitting shoes, the breeze (not too strong) and a neighbor who always says hello, and on and on and on. I began to feel like a broken record. With so many things for which to be grateful, I have trouble focusing on individual things. If I started to list all the things—just today—I give thanks for, I’d have to write all day. I see people in wheelchairs, or bedridden in nursing homes, unable even to dress themselves, and I think, “Wow! How come I’m so blessed?” All of the senses cause me to reflect and give thanks.

Helen Keller, lacking two very important senses still gave thanks for those she had. Amazing! And inspiring. She said, “What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.” And, “So long as the memory of certain beloved friends live in my heart I shall say that life is good.”

I can tell that this month’s effort to focus on giving thanks is taking root and growing like a vicious, or should I say, benevolent, circle. That’s a good thing, isn’t it?

yin/yang

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photos

Posted on November 21, 2014 by dmdubay

morning

I take a lot of photographs, not that I’m a great photographer, but I love trying to capture the moment. René is really good at it and has great technical skills as well. She rarely takes posed portraits; instead she likes to catch people in their natural habitats. Somehow she is able to capture the essence of a happening or relationship—an art form that requires keen powers of observation.

I am grateful for the photos she shares with me. And I am grateful for my own snapshots of life and nature that help me to relive the joys I’ve experienced.

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memories

Posted on November 19, 2014 by dmdubay

Memories are precious and connect us to a reality that is timeless. The other day a friend mentioned that a log house we built in Alaska was up for sale on the Internet. We looked it up and sure enough, an advertisement for the log house we built forty years ago featured many pictures of our first home. Memories flooded over us as we viewed the pictures showing in what good shape it remains. So much love and care went into its design and building. My parents and brother were a tremendous help in its construction. We were all young and strong then.

I was reminded of a poem I recently heard. I think it was entitled “I am She.” Wonderfully crafted, it spoke of being all the things I have ever been. I am that child sitting on her mother’s lap. I am the young newlywed, the struggling student and the grandparent. Within me right now—the eternal now—are all the experiences I have ever had: the good, the bad and the ugly—and the beautiful. I love that idea. It makes me want to embrace the now and live it fully, drawing from it all that I can, so that as I go forward, this, too, will be a memory I cherish.

sisters

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outdoors

Posted on November 18, 2014 by dmdubay

Another sunny day! I keep saying, “only a few more hours of work and all the bulbs will be planted and all of my gardens put to bed.” But it is such a pleasure to be outside. I am looking for excuses to be out in the sunshine. I find things needing to be moved, or trimmed, more compost to be spread and a few more weeds to be pulled. Who would have thought that I would find pleasure in weeding? It is nice to see them slowed down, though, and know that they won’t be able to get a foothold until spring. I give thanks today for all the green and growing things and for the time when they refrain from growing.

Pampas grass

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